ACA “Reparenting my inner child” guidebook. Exercise – What’s Your Story? Directions: on each of the statements below, share what you learned about good parenting from these methods.
Watching how my parents behaved and choosing their healthy actions
Outwardly my parents were good and moral. They kept a tidy and clean house and garden. They took the bins out each week. They paid the bills. They got involved in church and community and volunteered at things. My mum cooked and baked and didn’t buy processed foods.
Watching my parents’ behavior and doing the opposite of what they did
My parents didn’t talk about emotions or feelings. They controlled conversations and environments. They didn’t really laugh. Life seemed hard and full of work and responsibility. The air was often tense and scary. So doing the opposite of this is to talk about emotions and feelings, pray to God for me to let go of control. Listen in conversations. Make time for fun and relaxation and laugh.
Seeing parenting in movies and on television shows
I can’t really think of anything right now other than the Brady Bunch. But that family seemed like they cared about each other and each others feelings.
Looking at friends’ parents and emulating them
My friend has a mum who believed her about her child sexual abuse. Her mum has engaged with the process of healing and recovery. A male friend of mine told me about some good parenting today between him and his teenage son. He encouraged his son to be honest and open with the boys boss to ask him if he could come late to work so he could watch his little brother play sport. My friend offered his son helpful things to say and showed that being honest and open can help you achieve what you want.
Using good parenting behavior seen in public places
I’m not sure about this one.
Reading books about good parenting
I feel resistant to this because I don’t have kids but I know this exercise is about reparenting my kids. I’m not sure I feel a bit silly thinking about this idea.
Taking classes on good parenting
Same as above. I just feel thankful I didn’t have kids. I already have a lot of inside parts to look after.
I am a 42 year old woman and survivor of satanic ritual abuse. I have dissociative identity disorder and experience complex PTSD symptoms. Despite this, I am relatively high functioning and tend to be very active and engaged in life. I started remembering my abuse at around the age of 25. Prior to that I had no solid memory of my childhood and things just felt blank. I was programmed to keep very busy in order to forget my abuse and so I was always on the go and doing things.
I was lucky to find an interest in the creative arts and filmmaking, so my pursuits have mostly been very stimulating and enjoyable, though hard work. Almost everything I did kept me away from myself and I would say that I was extremely disconnected from the way that I felt in general. I always felt something was wrong, but couldn't put my finger on it. When I discovered I had been sexually abused as a child, it was like my whole world changed and everything that I had felt or experienced prior to this was a lie. Everything, yet nothing, made sense. I wanted to pursue recovery and wholeness immediately, but the more I tried to do this, the more walls I kept hitting. Programming was inbuilt in me to 'not remember' and I thought I would die if I did. The paradox was, that I longed to die, and suffered suicidal ideation on an almost daily basis for over ten years. I had used drugs and alcohol from the age of 13 to self soothe and medicate and the turning point for me was when I hit a rock bottom with drinking at the age of 31.
I went into AA and that really kickstarted my journey of recovery. I learnt how to deal with life without picking up a drink or a drug and most importantly, I was led to my real saviour, Jesus Christ. Almost a year into being sober, I started hearing voices. I had heard these voices for a long time but had stifled them with alcohol and drugs. The voices were extremely loud and negative and told me to kill myself. I sought psychotherapy and prayer ministry and it was through these experiences that I discovered I had dissociative parts of self (multiple personalities). Since accepting this, I have definitely started to get better, although it has been a long journey. I am in my tenth year of sobriety and on a very personal, determined journey to find myself within my fragmented identity.
This is a blog about Dissociation, Satanic Ritual Abuse, God and other stuff.
I live in Melbourne, Australia. Please stick around and share your thoughts too.
View all posts by Leni
My life as a dissociative 